Writing on the internet is an interesting balance of vulnerability and privacy. How much of my life do I let people in on and what do I feel needs to be kept private?

This messy, disgusting state of my kitchen sink tonight is one of those things that fall in the grey area between TMI and relatable. I’m not sure why I felt the need to snap a photo in the first place. It’s definitely not winning any Pinterest points anytime soon. So, what am I doing?

I know somewhere out there is a Mama who is struggling with overwhelm and exhaustion. Maybe it’s you. You’ve worked all day, cooked dinner, bathed little ones, tucked them into bed and walked out to find another mess standing between you and crawling between the cozy, wrinkled sheets.

I see you.

I am you.

As moms we carry so much weight between homemaking tasks, school schedules, a job, the actual weight of our clingy toddler and on and on. I just need to say that I really lucked out with a husband who helps lighten the load quite a bit. There is so much that he takes on so I don’t have to. But it doesn’t mean that life is easy-breezy. There is so much to manage and plan out and be present for. My brain actually cannot keep up with everything it’s expected to. I’m sure you know what all of this feels like.

There’s a post going around Instagram about seeing your tasks as blessings. A way of retraining your brain to focus on the good in life. For example, the dirty sink means that my children were nourished today and I’m thankful we have food to eat and dishes to clean. I try and take this mindset sometimes and it does work.

But what about those nights where you are just too overwhelmed by life to stop and find a positive? The nights where seeing the dirty sink sends you into instant tears and you just don’t know if things will get better? I have those moments too. A lot more often than I’d like to admit. Sometimes the blessings feel more like burdens. It feels terrible to admit, especially when those blessings are our children. I know, it’s heavy.

On these nights, I let the tears fall. I take a couple of deep breaths. Sometimes I turn on some worship music. Other nights I scrub the dishes in silence, my heart crying out to God, desperate for his presence.

There isn’t a formula here, no 3-step solution on how to prevent the overwhelm from happening. I’m sure rest and good food and exercise would be recommended as starting points. But I want to offer you a little encouragement from one mom to another… You are doing a good job. Even if you leave the dishes in the sink overnight.

I love to “put the house to bed” every night and part of that means no dishes left over. It makes my morning a run a little smoother when I have an empty sink to start out with. But as a kindness to the exhausted version of myself, I will sometimes walk right past the mess in an effort to prevent the burn out I feel creeping over me. I’m not perfect at it, but I have learned to give myself permission to let go of the perfection. To allow myself to rest when my body and mind are pleading for a moment to slow down.

I hope you are able to give yourself permission too. Maybe it’s not the kitchen sink for you. Maybe it’s permission to leave the laundry unfolded so you can join in a game of hide and seek with your kiddos. Or maybe you need permission to sit on the couch and read that new home magazine that showed up 3 days ago in the mail while your toddler naps.

Whatever it is, can I be the one to offer your the permission you need?

I’m not saying toss all of your duties to the wind and never look back (though that does sound freeing. Kidding. Sort of.). But it is 100% ok and actually incredibly healthy to reprioritize the things in your life that matter to come first. Things like your mental health, your children, your husband, your faith. I used to think the world would end. It didn’t. And yours won’t either. I promise.

As I passed the sink on my way to bed, I realized that I don’t feel even a little guilty tonight leaving all these dishes there. I’m a work in progress and will celebrate all the wins, big or small. They give me hope that what I am doing, all the unseen and mundane moments, all add up to a beautiful life spent glorifying God and loving others well. God sees all that we do.

You can leave the dishes tonight, go curl up with a book, play Uno with your husband, or catch up on some sleep. I’ve got an Uno date night actually. So here is your permission: Leave the dishes in the sink tonight, Mama. You deserve a little rest and relaxing.