Parenting is hard.
With or without a diagnosis.
With or without a spouse or partner there to help.
With or without faith in God.
Whether you had a stable childhood of your own or not.
Whether your child is biological, adopted or fostered.
It’s just really freaking hard.
I have struggled with sharing my personal journey in motherhood because though I want to be open and honest, I also want to protect my children’s privacy and their own story.
I don’t want to scare other moms with any negativity or take away from their joy and dreams of becoming a mom. Because it is truly wonderful. No journey is the same.
I also don’t want to be accused of being ungrateful for my children or for the gift of motherhood by discussing the rough, raw or hard parts of it. I know there are women struggling with infant loss, miscarriage and infertility and I am deeply aware of their emotions and how my words may affect them.
This has caused incredible feelings of inauthenticity, isolation and anxiety the past few years for me. And I wonder how many other moms struggle silently because they feel a need to act, say or perform in an “acceptable way” in public…while they’re falling apart behind the safety of their bedroom door.
I want you to know, whether you’re a new mom, a veteran mom, or praying desperately to be a mom, I see you. Please don’t ever be afraid to voice your needs or to ask me for help. And please don’t ever apologize for needing to vent or to celebrate a win.
All I know to do is show up, be authentic, honest and stop worrying about being a “perfect mom”. I may step on toes, say the wrong things and hurt feelings but may I always be empathetic and humble enough to apologize, learn and grow so I can be the kind of friend and woman I want to be.
Motherhood may be hard and overwhelming but I refuse to let it be lonely and isolating anymore.